I feel like.

I feel like time is running out. I constantly see sand filtering through an hourglass in my mind. If I stop what I'm doing and pay attention to it, something happens to my lungs. It's hard to breathe.

I don't think I've ever been so frightened in my life. What's happening?

Taking a break.

Taking a break from my pile of homework to write something that doesn't require a ridiculous amount of referencing >:(

Last Monday Lisa, Maz and I went to Wide Open Mic at Mojos. Katiy joined us soon after. We stayed for a little while but started to feel rude because we were talking while the people were playing. We decided to go on an adventure.

We drove to the shops to grab some supplies: cookies, shapes, iced coffee, red bull for Kaity, four little plastic bottles, flour and food colouring. Oh yes, we had a plan. Lisa told us of a little basketball court under the bridge in North Fremantle, so that's where we headed. We filledour little bottles with flour, food colouring and river water and painted a lovely little mural and (after a little complaining by me about the fact that we are university students and traditionally we're supposed to be the activists and why were we never doing any cool protesting like they do in the movies and blah blah) a message. Humans > Robots. Duh.



My parents were confused by my blue hands when I returned home at about 11. What a wonderful night of fun.

In other news, apparently self-loathing is causing me to make enemys of people that I don't disslike. Yes, thanks for the info. So what the fuck do I do about it?

Congratulations Elisa. You're stupid.

WELL.

WELL FUCK. It seems fairly obvious now that I am not going to recieve any exciting photos from Fairbridge, so I'm gonna roll with none. Feck, this'll be boring with no eye-candy. I'll try to google some photos perhaps? Nah... Can't find any decent ones... Here's the only one I took all weekend, and it's of Kate. SIGH.

Plus one of me being rad and Katie in the foreground:

Thursday night saw Kate and I buying supplies. Canned goods, bread and cake galore. Disgusting. Stayed the night at hers in her theatre room (yeah, what a whore, I know). Friday we probably should have set off early, but we didn't. I doubt anyone is surprised.

The drive to Fairbridge takes maybe one hour. We drove with the windows down, so that air pumped through the car and whipped our hair into tangled nests. I stuck my head out and stared at the sky, a huge grin plastered across my face. Life felt good.

Who knows what we did that afternoon. Met up with Mariion (would like to point out that, yes, her name is spelt with one i, but she thinks it looks cooler with two, and I agree ;D), Katie, Elena and Marina. At night we wandered to the outskirts of the area to have a smoke and a giggle. Er, and then? My memorie's turned to sludge.

Saturday we went to the dining hall for drinkies, I bought a huge lolly in the shape of a foot which took me an immeasurable time to consume and we discussed drawing moustaches on each other. Hum.

We then went to some gigs (What? At a music festival? Surely not!). They were good, but the most memorable was certainly Daniel Champagne. I do hope he doesn't read this. Not that I'm going to say anything particularly contraversial...



Half way through Elena, Marina and Kate left on a personal errand (I don't actually know why they went) so Maz, Katie and I were alone. Katie, mesmerized by Daniels crazy guitar skillz and still slightly inebriated, waited until a particularly quiet part in a song to announce "This is AMAZING!" and sent us off into giggles. People probably thought we were rather rude, but Daniel said later that he didn't hear us laughing...

After the show we accosted him backstage - as you do. We told him we had no money so we couldn't buy his cd but what was he doing later? Nothing, he didn't really know anyone, so we invited him to whatever it was we had planned. Somehow Katie managed to suggest that he could sleep outside thier tent. How did this come up? Who knows. He gave me his number.

A while later we found a spot behind some mounds of dirt - class - and I sent off a text to Daniel. He came and found us and we had another smoke. We spent most of the rest of the night hanging out, feasting, smoking, drinking and falling over (in the case of... Who? I will not name-names, you drunkard).

When we were all in Kate and I's (? this can not be grammatically correct) tent, Kate and I had an argument in Danish. She wanted to go home, I said she was drunk etc. She left, and I professed to the tent at large that she would not actually go. She did. A text in the morning confirmed that she was still alive and well, back in Perth.

Sunday I spent with Maz and Katie. I fell asleep in Katies car in the afternoon - I know, terrible effort. We left some time in the evening. Katies car battery was dead, so Maz and I pushed it up a hill, then back down again to push-start it. Great success.

I'm getting sick of writing this now because I can not remember all the exciting bits. My brain is so addled. It was an amazing weekend - what more can I say?

Something.

Something to fill the time.

http://prittee1.deviantart.com/art/FUCK-160556788

I will be posting some words about Fairbridge as soon as I recieve some photographic evidence.

FOR CRYING OUT LOUD.

For cyring out loud, I'm a retard. From now on, this blog will be different... Maybe.

Last night was fabulous. After dinner, Mariion, Lisa, Claudia and I walked down to Bicton baths. It was just before midnight, I think. We had set up camp on the grass by the shore - a blanket with all our equipment in the middle.

There was a noise from near by; a laugh, but one that seemed contrived. It spread from the murky area by some upturned row boats. A single burst of laughter - one person's mirth. It was odd.

For a while, there was nothing more, and we decided to continue as planned. The only sign of life from that area for the rest of the night was when a man emerged, topless and adjusting his pants. He stepped out of the shaddows for only a moment, before returning. I can't imagine what he was doing.

Others joined us a little later and we spoke with them for some time. Lisa tired of our adventure soon after. The leftovers up at Mariions house were clearly beckoning for her to return. The two of them began sending text messages to each other. I stole Mariions phone when she was consumed with giggles and continued the exchange. I don't remember much of the conversation, but I do recall having particular problems when I attempted to write, "Just relax you tricky dicky!".

We left. Claudia and I were walking slightly behind Lisa and Mariion when a comment I made about the world being in fast forward cause the two in front to pick up the pace. Eventually, they were sprinting away from us.

When we got home we ate a rather disturbing amount of food between us, before we four retired to the two-man tent that had been set up in the garden earlier in the day.

Oh, but it was a good night.

When I'm not doing anything.

When I'm not doing anything I feel a bit shit. Now is one of those times. I'm in between awesome things.

Yesterday I met with Megan and Patrick. We went to Freo. Meg and I had different tofu meals at the upmarkets. It was very zen.

I stayed the night with her. I wrote, and she drew, and then we watched Fantastic Mr. Fox. I wrote what I think may be called an article of some sort. It was part anger, part cynacism, and part contentment. What an odd combination.

I came home this morning and now I am looking up vegetarian recipes and sipping the lemon lime and bitters I just concocted.

This evening I am going to dinner at Mariions house with Lisa and others. We will eat before heading down to Bicton Baths to camp out under the stars and consume elicit substances.

I hate the waiting.

There's my heart.

There’s my heart.
Where?
There, on the floor.
That?
Yes.
Why is it there?
That’s where you put it
after you stood on it
after you jumped on it
after you spat on it
but guess what?
What?
I don’t need it anymore. I don’t need you anymore.

This is what I have resolved:
I am alone for a reason. There are things I have to do; things I need to achieve. I do not need anyone, but more than that, I do not want anyone. They will only get in my way.
Don't think that this is a temporary resolution. This is who I am now.

I am seious.

I am seriously thinking about what to do with my life. I don't think I'm enjoying uni as much as I should be because I am not really into my course.

I always just assumes that uni would be where I ended up, but what if it is not for me? There's nothing I want to do but write.

I wish I hadn't defered already, so I could defer now and have some time to just write without having to worry about deadlines and responsibilities for a while. Then maybe I could finish my novel and actually give it a chance. I could try my luck with publishing.

I suppose for now the smart thing to do is to stay in school and just try to get the most I can out of it.

I always make things difficult for myself >:(

Poetry.

Poetry by ~prittee1 on deviantART

Oh hello.

Oh hello blog, fancy seeing you here. It's time to review.

1. I've started university now - enjoying it for the most part. I just love being at uni. The UWA campus is just gorgeous. I'm already ahead on my assignments, but falling behind on my reading (who's surprised?).

2. I'm working two or three times a week back at Flipside. It's still good fun, and the people are cool, but it's so ridiculously busy all the time. It's stressful, and I'm not sure how much longer I'm going to want to be doing it.

3. I've just started hockey again (played for the first time on Saturday). Next weekend I will be playing a two day competition down in Bunbury, which I am really looking forward to. Also, the plan is for me to be assistant coach for one of the junior teams this year.

4. Relatioship status is non-existant. I'm over the drama. I don't want any of it anymore. Attractive boys should stay away from me because they are just a distraction.

5. I'm taking creative writing at uni so I've been writing at least one piece every week, which I'm very happy about. My novel, however, has been put on hold due to lack of time and inspiration. People are quite annoyed at me for this, but that's life I guess.

Those five points kind of summarise my life at the moment. Is that sad?

THE END.