Fragments.

Fragments of my mind are detatching. They float off into the ether.
What a cliché...



I’ll pull the hairs one by one
So I can savour the sting
As the flesh jerks

I’ll brand myself something sinful
So I can relish the buzz of the needle
Puncturing my skin

I’ll never say no to you
So tomorrow I’ll have something
To cry about for hours

We had a movie night.

We had a movie night at Jackson's the other day. Stan and Jackson picked Patrick and I up from ours and we went to get movies. Silence of the Lambs, Evolution, Gamer and some Asian shit Stan picked up ;)

Back at Jackson, Stan made stir-fry for the boys. Marlo, Megan and Julian turned up at some point. We all watched Silence of the Lambs and Gamer. Patrick threw a shirt at me, and in the proccess of throwing it back I knocked a glass of coke off the counter above me and it went all down my back. I was unimpressed. I blame Patrick entirely.


The three late comers were the first to leave, then Patrick, Stan, Jackson and I managed to waste away a few hours, until Jackson ordered everyone to sleep. Stan and Patrick, unimpressed by the idea, decided to leave, so Jackson and I finallyyyyyy got to go to bed.

The next day we slept almost completely through. We were up at... Four, maybe? We did nothing for a while then took Bowman the dog for a walk when it got dark. Jackson tried to make me run, but I informed him I don't run without a tennis racket or a hockey stick in hand. Silly boy.

What lovely, lazy days I've been having. Holidays are bliss.

Photos, anyone?

A series of attractive Jackson expressions:






Disturbing on so many levels (Patrick - Stan looks virtually normal):


Aww, just like one big happy family (So many tangled limbs)!:

Pre ridiculously drunk at a Justin Walshe Folk Machine gig in North Perth:

The next night, at a play about child abuse (we're such a bunch of socialites):

Lament.

Lament

They say to me, “Time means nothing at all
“It’s what you do with it that matters”
But sand through the glass takes an age to fall
I dwell on silence that nothing shatters
Where the desire did burn and ache and tug
This time hurt festers into something sour
But the emptiness that I gouged and dug
Means little when I change with each hour
The notes and beats which were once so soothing
May now sound to me so mocking and vile
But time says they will again be moving
One day I will remember us and smile
Though I’ll look back fondly on love and lust
For now your mix-tapes sit and gather dust

It's a sonnet. So what?

Today.

Today was one of the laziest days of my life.

Last night Patrick and I stayed at Jacksons. We watched movies, we had some sheesha, we were mesmerized by a ventriloquist with a duck. We went to bed at about 5am. Jackson said I passed out on the couch in the living room, but I woke up on the couch in the front room. Funny, that.

I think I was awake by about 1. Jackson came into the front room and took up all my lying space. I don't think we actually got up till about 3. Patrick, who was sleeping on a mattress on the floor, definitely didn't stir till about then. Jacksons brother got home from school before we'd moved.

We spent the remainder of the daylight watching youtube. My Dad picked Patrick and I up. Now I'm here... I have an exam tomorrow. Eep.

On Saturday I had an exam too. After, I had just enough time to wolf down a bowl of pasta before my hockey game. Got home to text messages from Patrick and Jackson saying come out etc. I caved, showered, train-ed, and met them in the city. Meg and others were with them too. We went to The Court. Jackson made me drink things fast.

Jackon and I stayed the night at Patricks. We took the train home, and at the train station I walked into a bench three or four times. Patrick had a feast of vending machine food and Jackson disappeared for quite a while.

The next day... was a blur. I don't remember much of the day time at all. It's entirely possible that's because we slept through it. Every time I'm with those boys we don't seem to sleep until 6am at the earliest.

Why did I write all that in reverse? I think my brain is going to implode.

Now whaaaaaaaat....................? Self destruct.

It's study week.

It's study week this week which means I'm watching movies, writing, sewing, and just generally avoiding studying.

I wrote a short story today which I kind of like (at the moment). Sent it to a few people. They didn't say anything about it. Does this mean it's shit? Probably. Meh.

I really want to re-read my novel and try to write some more for it.

I'm currently making a risotto for my dinner, and later tonight I will probably make an apple pie because I've been craving one for sooo long, and it's not my washing up night tonight so win-win situation hey?

Going to finish sewing my bloody dress soon too. Gathering the skirt is taking so damn long. It best be worth it or I'll probably cry.

So there. Plenty of activities other than study to occupy my time. Lovely.

Didn't I?

Didn't I promise that my posts on here would no longer be like those bellow? Sheesh.

Here, have two photos from Groovin the Moo:

Hehehehehehehehe....

And, anyone for some terrible poetry??

http://prittee1.deviantart.com/art/Cross-to-Bear-165128605

Kbye.

Wow.

Wow, I have changed a lot. It hit me last night at Groovin the Moo. I don't really know who I am anymore.

I feel sort of demoralised and useless - incapable of resolution and lacking the fight I used to have in me. It's kind of sad.

I used to be a really strong, confident person, didn't I? I knew what direction I was heading in. I knew what my limits were. I don't feel like I have any limits anymore. It's scary. I feel like I'm pushing myself too far.

I find myself going to further and further extremes, these days. Recently I've gone places I used to think I never would. But it doesn't seem to matter so much anymore.

I don't feel as if I have anyones expectations to live up to, but this isn't a good thing. I still want my parents to be proud of me, but I can do whatever I want when I'm out without them really knowing about it. I used to want to be good for someone, but I lost them long ago.

This is a horrible come-down.

Apparently.

Free-IQTest.net - Free IQ Tests

Apparently this makes me a genius. Shows how accurate these tests are.

I feel like.

I feel like time is running out. I constantly see sand filtering through an hourglass in my mind. If I stop what I'm doing and pay attention to it, something happens to my lungs. It's hard to breathe.

I don't think I've ever been so frightened in my life. What's happening?

Taking a break.

Taking a break from my pile of homework to write something that doesn't require a ridiculous amount of referencing >:(

Last Monday Lisa, Maz and I went to Wide Open Mic at Mojos. Katiy joined us soon after. We stayed for a little while but started to feel rude because we were talking while the people were playing. We decided to go on an adventure.

We drove to the shops to grab some supplies: cookies, shapes, iced coffee, red bull for Kaity, four little plastic bottles, flour and food colouring. Oh yes, we had a plan. Lisa told us of a little basketball court under the bridge in North Fremantle, so that's where we headed. We filledour little bottles with flour, food colouring and river water and painted a lovely little mural and (after a little complaining by me about the fact that we are university students and traditionally we're supposed to be the activists and why were we never doing any cool protesting like they do in the movies and blah blah) a message. Humans > Robots. Duh.



My parents were confused by my blue hands when I returned home at about 11. What a wonderful night of fun.

In other news, apparently self-loathing is causing me to make enemys of people that I don't disslike. Yes, thanks for the info. So what the fuck do I do about it?

Congratulations Elisa. You're stupid.