I made.

I made this:



Mmhmm...

Just wasting away the time, as usual.

At school.

At school. In Classics class. I'm researching Zues. He has a fucked up family tree. He slept with lots of his sisters. But then, I guess he didn't have many options...

Got back from England two days ago. It was a fun time. Got to hug my mummy (yay!) and dad and I had some good giggles :)

I wrote a poem while over there:

It's hard to stop yourself from dreaming
When dreaming is all you have left.
When you've been gone so long, so far,
That the distance had left you bereft
Of his face and his hands and the curve of his back,
Which kept you so long entertained,
On late nights - Now early flights-
Now fatigue and aches and pains.

When settling is all you want,
And disruptions are all you get,
The dreams are what you hold on to-
When you're alone sometimes you forget
That alone is never really alone
If someone is prepared to wait,
So you hold on to those dreams of him, soon,
Of one kiss - one look - one embrace.

Is it good or bad? I don't know, but I like it, and apparently so does he :)

4 and a half months left. I'm counting down the days.

Here's how.

Here's how my life goes: fuck-up, fuck-up, fuck-up. Elisa get's something great, then Elisa fucks it up.

So obviously this isn't entirely true, it's just how I feel at the moment.

I feel really weird - but then I guess I always do, don't I?

My parents are here and it's lovely because I've missed them so much. But last night we had 'the talk' that I have been dreading - the one about coming home. It doesn't seem like a possibility now, and I feel so horrible. Not just for me, but for Austen too. I feel as if I am asking so much of him. Really, he owes me nothing - less than nothing. I'm such a fucking bitch.

BUT, I'm trying to stay positive so on the other hand, as of today I am due home in exactly 5 months. That means I have lasted here, alone, for 7 months. So I've achieved something, right?

GAH. Can't concentrate.

What I really want is Austen to come visit, just to break up the last few months of my stay so it doesn't feel so long - for both of us. I've been looking seriously into how much money I'll have over the next couple of months, as well as plane tickets around the time he's on holidays. I think I can scrape together $1000. Maybe. The cheapest ticket I can find is just under $2000. Am I crazy to think we could find that much?

This is, of course, assuming he even wants to come all this way to see me.

Fuck. I'm the most selfish person I know.

Today.

Today I have nothing to do. I am sitting in front of the tv with a coffee, looking through one of my old journals and thinking about nothing in particular.

I was going to go for a walk but it looks like rain.

The party in Christiania was pretty cool. It was like a massive street party and there was a really good dj playing great house music. I got kinda grossed out by some guys who were talking to us while we were sitting down cause they were seedy as and snorted coke in front of us. Yuck.

Tonight Elisabeth and Julie are going to see Madonna, so I've got to babysit Eric until Johannes gets home from work. Woo - hoo.

Goddamn Elisabeth wants me to paint her some raver nails. SO I'd better go do that... I guess... sounds like a party.

I have been.

I have been away for a while because Julz has been over for the week.

It's been pretty great apart from one night where we had a dnm and I'm pretty sure I just cried and bitched all the way through.

We went to Christiania on one of the days and had a wonderful walk around through all the houses and by the lake. We found an abandoned building and Julz walked in on a woman performing fellatio on a man there.


We spent one day at the beach with my host sister -

- and another taking photos of my host families amazing house.

Last night we went to see Aqua play in the Tivoli gardens in Copenhagen. It was pretty fab and after we me up with Ash and Maddy for drinks in a bar, then late night Burger King.

On the walk home I was quite munted I think, because I barely noticed walking far - which we did, because the night bus doesn't stop close to my house. We walked past a building where a couple of guys stuck their heads out the top floor window and one yelled down to us. Conversation went along the lines of:

Him: It's not often we see such attractive ladies walking down the street at this time.
Us: Yeah... Thanks...
Him: Listen, I'm an honest guy so are you girls interested in any sexual seduction?
Us: No...
Him: Are you sure? Not interested in any sex?
Us: No thanks.
Him: Ok, have a nice night.
Us: Thanks, you too!
Him: *TOTALLY INSANE SCARY LAUGH*
Julz: Lololol.
Me: o_O

Further along our walk we found some long haired cattle in a field and went to say hi. I was wondering out loud how they could possibly keep the cows in the field with such a flimsy wire fence when it electrocuted me - the bastard. At the time I hardly felt it and I was laughing but now, the morning after, my limbs are so sore!

Tonight there is a summer party in Christiania which Julz and I are going to. It should be fantastic, and today I'm going to buy some gum boots and a giant cardigan to wear to it :D

Anywaysies I've gone and written too much now haven't I?

Sheesh.

Sheesh, I should be sleeping right now. Julz is, and snoring rather prettily I might add.

Just had a conversation with my ex on fb. I can always tell I am mega bored when I end up talking to him. I pretended to be interested for at least 15 minutes!

I need to straighten my hair. It's all curly and threatening to swallow my head whole. And then what would I be? Just a headless body walking around - that would be rather pointless.

I'm gonna make a case for my harmonica so that it won't get scratched.

Hmmm, maybe I should spend less time accessorizing my stuff, and more time actually using it.

Shit I'm tired. I should really get some z's...

So Yesterday.

So yesterday was fun. We went to the beach and swam. Then at night I made a crocodile in the sand.


Pretty epic, right? Yeah, I'm kinda awesome like that. The kids were impressed, at least.

Tonight we leave Bornholm.

We pick up Julz from Copenhagen airport tomorrow morning at 10. I'm amped.

Now I'm off to have a shower and a nap before we leave.